vtuking

Premium ejaculation

I know it can be frustrating to lose control of your own erection. It sounds like you are suffering from premature ejaculation, one of the most common types of erectile dysfunction. It is characterised by a man’s loss of his erection before or immediately after penetration. The man is unable to control when or if to complete the sexual act because his penis goes from erect to flaccid, sometimes without warning. It is difficult to speak on what could be causing it based on your brief descriptions so I will discuss a few reasons that could be responsible for this condition.

Remember what I have said on several occasions in this column; the mind is our biggest and best sex organ. That means anything interfering with the mind’s ability to successfully send and receive sex messages to different parts of our bodies, including the penis, is likely to cause problems in terms of how a man functions sexually.

One of the most common causes of premature ejaculation is stress and anxiety. This could range from work related stressors to problems in the relationship or even major life events e.g. deaths, weddings, child birth, graduation, divorce/separation or other attachment injuries to the relationship such as infidelity. It’s important to remember that even positive life events have the potential to cause stress. Think of something as positive as a business that is doing well, or even a promotion at work; in and of itself, that’s a good thing, right? However, it comes with greater responsibilities, doesn’t it?

Without even being aware of it, your new improved financial or career position can cause stress in an unrelated area of your life i.e. your sex life. Another common cause of stress is performance anxiety. If you’ve been struggling in or out of the bedroom, it can increase the pressure to perform which only becomes a distraction to you as you’re trying to have intercourse; your brain (best sex organ, remember?) begins to send stress signals instead of sex signals, which interrupts your best intentions.

Another common reason is illness. A penis requires increased blood supply in order to become and remain erect. Any illness or disorder that could interfere with your body’s ability to send blood where it’s needed most, when it’s needed most, is likely to cause you problems with attaining or sustaining an erection; It can feel like your fuel literally ran out! These conditions include diseases such as diabetes, hypertension, thyroid disorders and heart conditions. In this category would also be hormonal disorders such as depression, low testosterone levels as well as conditions such as obesity.

Whatever the reason for your premature ejaculation, it is important to get it checked out by a qualified professional because no two situations are the same. If you suspect that yours is caused by a medical condition, a good place to begin is by seeing a GP (General Practitioner), a doctor who is able to perform a full body assessment. Based on the outcome of your assessment, your GP may refer you to a Urologist, a doctor who is specialised in the male reproductive system, who will then assess and treat you accordingly.

If, on the other hand, you suspect that your problem is being caused by a psychological problem, I suggest that you meet with a sex therapist or other qualified mental health professional. This will help you to get to the root of the problem as well as help you develop appropriate tools to manage the situation. A sex therapist will also teach you techniques that you can use to delay ejaculation.

Outside of a professional’s office, there are a few things you can try at home e.g. using a condom to decrease the sensation to your penis. Some condoms do come with a numbing lubricant; check with your local pharmacist. There has been some suggestion that using numbing agents on the penis without a condom reduces the sensitivity to your penis, allowing you to have intercourse. However, it can also numb out your partner, which is unlikely to be the desired outcome. Some men have found that masturbating before having sex reduces their arousal and sensitivity enough for them to perform as they wish with their partners. Finally, take the pressure off. Burdening your mind with ‘what ifs’ or other stressful thoughts does nothing but make your problem worse. Make it your business to look for ways of relaxing your mind before, during and after sex. Learn how to shelve all problems so that ‘sex time’ is really ‘sex time’. Guard that mental space and relax into it. Allow your brain to do its best sex work by sending the right messages when you need them most i.e. you’re having intercourse.

I hope that these suggestions are enough to trigger an idea for an appropriate starting place for you in your search for a true solution. Remember: these are all simply suggestions based on the little information that you have provided. If they don’t work, please e-mail me and make an appointment to meet and see how to go about helping you.

and can’t go beyond 30 seconds, what could be wrong with me? Sam,

Dear Sam,

I know it can be frustrating to lose control of your own erection. It sounds like you are suffering from premature ejaculation, one of the most common types of erectile dysfunction. It is characterised by a man’s loss of his erection before or immediately after penetration. The man is unable to control when or if to complete the sexual act because his penis goes from erect to flaccid, sometimes without warning. It is difficult to speak on what could be causing it based on your brief descriptions so I will discuss a few reasons that could be responsible for this condition.

Remember what I have said on several occasions in this column; the mind is our biggest and best sex organ. That means anything interfering with the mind’s ability to successfully send and receive sex messages to different parts of our bodies, including the penis, is likely to cause problems in terms of how a man functions sexually.

One of the most common causes of premature ejaculation is stress and anxiety. This could range from work related stressors to problems in the relationship or even major life events e.g. deaths, weddings, child birth, graduation, divorce/separation or other attachment injuries to the relationship such as infidelity. It’s important to remember that even positive life events have the potential to cause stress. Think of something as positive as a business that is doing well, or even a promotion at work; in and of itself, that’s a good thing, right? However, it comes with greater responsibilities, doesn’t it?

Without even being aware of it, your new improved financial or career position can cause stress in an unrelated area of your life i.e. your sex life. Another common cause of stress is performance anxiety. If you’ve been struggling in or out of the bedroom, it can increase the pressure to perform which only becomes a distraction to you as you’re trying to have intercourse; your brain (best sex organ, remember?) begins to send stress signals instead of sex signals, which interrupts your best intentions.

Another common reason is illness. A penis requires increased blood supply in order to become and remain erect. Any illness or disorder that could interfere with your body’s ability to send blood where it’s needed most, when it’s needed most, is likely to cause you problems with attaining or sustaining an erection; It can feel like your fuel literally ran out! These conditions include diseases such as diabetes, hypertension, thyroid disorders and heart conditions. In this category would also be hormonal disorders such as depression, low testosterone levels as well as conditions such as obesity.

Whatever the reason for your premature ejaculation, it is important to get it checked out by a qualified professional because no two situations are the same. If you suspect that yours is caused by a medical condition, a good place to begin is by seeing a GP (General Practitioner), a doctor who is able to perform a full body assessment. Based on the outcome of your assessment, your GP may refer you to a Urologist, a doctor who is specialised in the male reproductive system, who will then assess and treat you accordingly.

If, on the other hand, you suspect that your problem is being caused by a psychological problem, I suggest that you meet with a sex therapist or other qualified mental health professional. This will help you to get to the root of the problem as well as help you develop appropriate tools to manage the situation. A sex therapist will also teach you techniques that you can use to delay ejaculation.

Outside of a professional’s office, there are a few things you can try at home e.g. using a condom to decrease the sensation to your penis. Some condoms do come with a numbing lubricant; check with your local pharmacist. There has been some suggestion that using numbing agents on the penis without a condom reduces the sensitivity to your penis, allowing you to have intercourse. However, it can also numb out your partner, which is unlikely to be the desired outcome. Some men have found that masturbating before having sex reduces their arousal and sensitivity enough for them to perform as they wish with their partners. Finally, take the pressure off. Burdening your mind with ‘what ifs’ or other stressful thoughts does nothing but make your problem worse. Make it your business to look for ways of relaxing your mind before, during and after sex. Learn how to shelve all problems so that ‘sex time’ is really ‘sex time’. Guard that mental space and relax into it. Allow your brain to do its best sex work by sending the right messages when you need them most i.e. you’re having intercourse.

I hope that these suggestions are enough to trigger an idea for an appropriate starting place for you in your search for a true solution. Remember: these are all simply suggestions based on the little information that you have provided. If they don’t work, please e-mail me and make an appointment to meet and see how to go about helping you.

vtuking

4 Comments

  1. Reply

    Premium ejaculation again

  2. Reply

    Haha
    Premium

  3. Reply

    Premium ejaculation…. Hmmm

  4. Reply

    Nice

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